Trigger warning: spanking. There are two things I’m afraid to write about, for myself. The first is music, and my relationship to it. The second is anger and my fear of myself when angry. SGM taught that anger is a sin. I remember my mom coming home from care group and telling me that it…
Day 3 : Why should those who haven’t been hurt care about this issue? What do you wish you could tell those who want to help but weren’t close enough to know or see your situation? What do you wish every pastor knew before starting ministry? What would make the church a safe space for…
Hi. I’m tardy. But that’s okay, right? We’re all messy here. You wouldn’t believe this week. But I’m going to rest this weekend. It’s so needed. Tonight I offer you my post for SAAW day 2! I’m going to write this SAAW response now, and then write the day 3 response tomorrow, if I can.…
SPIRITUAL ABUSE AWARENESS WEEK, DAY 1: My story I can’t find a way to make this a short post. I’ve been a little loath to answer this specific question since I started blogging. I prefer to tell vignettes and talk about the big picture of spiritual abuse in the church and use my story in…
I was talking with some friends this week about favorite childhood books (we’re still not over Sheftu. True story.) and I realized that reading good stories with strong female characters built a lot of subconscious mental structure which helped me see women as equal to men, and drove me to be skeptical of the soft…
People come together People go their own way Love conquers few Our love is like a paper airplane flying in the folded wind Riding high, dipping low But innocence is fair game, I’m hoping I can hold it in Our love will die, I know [Alison Krauss, Paper Airplane] When life falls apart, I’m anxious…
I was sitting with her, pouring out some woeful stories close to my heart. And when I finished, she chuckled and said this: “Weak men are intimidated by strong women. They don’t know what to do with them. They’re afraid of them.” And I’ve been mulling that over for two weeks. I call myself a…
My purpose with almost everything I write here is to communicate two things: 1) you are not alone and shame is not from Jesus, and 2) it is possible to develop an authentic theology of the body and live as an embodied sexual being and experience both healthy boundaries and real grace. These two things…
So, there’s this lawsuit against the denomination (or in their lingo, the “movement” or “family of churches”) that founded the cult-like church I grew up in, where the leaders are being accused of deliberately obstructing justice and preventing sexual abusers of children to live without consequences while making the children “reconcile” with their abusers. I…
I’ve avoided saying these words to myself for a long time, but it’s really the most accurate description: When I was 12, my family moved from California to the east coast to join a cult. I haven’t felt at home anywhere since. *** There were other factors, of course. Economy, family ideals for finding a…